pug talk

What? Oh, this?

2006-11-16T16:15:00.000-08:00

This was all just a big misunderstanding...

Howling

2006-11-12T17:50:00.001-08:00

A dog's gotta howl when asked. .

Winds of Change

2006-09-25T23:05:00.001-07:00

The other day, my brother Kilborn the cat disappeared. This is a big problem since he has been consistently providing me on a daily basis with dessert (from his rear end).

Now, this weird looking dog Truman has showed up. First, he just started hanging out.

Next, the carrier he arrived in disappeared and this crate appeared a few feet from mine.

Don't get me wrong, he's cool and all (despite his HUGE nose), but I'm a little confused as to his status.

Tired Puggy

2006-09-16T19:44:00.000-07:00

How tired a pug is is directly proportional to how far its tongue hangs out.

(My mouth is NOT open in this picture.)

Not Exactly My Idea of Dog Training but...

2006-09-04T13:45:00.000-07:00

Dad says that I should learn to win fights with ideas rather than with teeth.

When no one else will sit with me...

2006-08-30T22:32:00.000-07:00

...I can always count on the arm rest to cuddle with me.

Foot Binding

2006-08-26T18:14:00.000-07:00

As much as I try to pretend that I'm french, in the end, a pug's native roots are in China. In the spirit of my heritage, my parents thought it'd be fun to bind my feet. I guess this makes me more sexually attractive, so I'm willing to go through the process if it means some future hot action with that shih-tzu downstairs.

Hot Date!

2006-08-12T11:27:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, Isabelle's parents went on vacation.

That meant that I got to spend some quality time with my princess.

I get all crazy whenever I see her and I tend to show off by yelping and running in figure 8's while dragging my butt on the ground.

She apparently was eager to see me as well. She had gotten a new haircut, I assume, just for me.

So I marked the neighborhood, thus proving that I'm the man around here, and she reciprocated by letting me sniff her butt.

Staying Cool

2006-07-24T20:09:00.000-07:00

It's tough having a shortened palate in the summer. I haven't stopped panting in days. It's always nice to cool down with a shower though. Especially with pug shampoo.

Special Dinner

2006-07-20T20:54:00.000-07:00

Dad came home the other day and put a crispy fish burrito on the table in front of the couch. He then left to take a shower. I could only assume this meant it was mine. I had a little trouble opening the wrapper, but mmm mmm mmm was it good!!!

Party Animal

2006-07-09T18:49:00.000-07:00

Last night, Isabelle's dad had a birthday party. While I tried multiple times to enter the house to say hi to my on-again-off-again girl, I remained relegated to the patio.

There I found beer.

I was lucky enough to find a human to help a pug out.

Summer Camp

2006-07-04T20:25:00.000-07:00

This weekend I'm blogging from CageFree K-9 Camp. I've been here a few times and it's amazing. They've even got a special small dog area.

Ferme La Porte

2006-06-21T18:26:00.000-07:00

Which is french, my first language, for "close the door". You know, whatever I can do to help around the house and earn my keep.

The Great Pug Run

2006-05-05T20:10:00.000-07:00

Sometimes Dad takes me on walks. Other times he takes me on runs. In my youth, I was a long distance runner - the only pug I know of who's run a 10K in under 50 minutes. Since turning 21 (3 in human years) I'm just into 100 yard dashes. But as the link above shows, I still gotz da skillz.

Carlos

2006-05-04T16:44:00.000-07:00

At first I thought my dad was trying to throw me off by bringing a mirror on our morning walk. But upon careful testing, I noticed that the "image" wasn't mimicking my motions. It was in fact, Carlos!

I hadn't seen Carlos for a few months so I figured I ought to remind him, by marking various objects, that the entire neighborhood was my turf. I'm not sure though if his subsequent markings were acknowledgement or annexation.

Scotch

2006-04-24T23:33:00.000-07:00

I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Down in my belly. Drink drink drink.

Easter Breakfast

2006-04-16T12:43:00.000-07:00

I got to attend breakfast this morning at our neighbor's house. Unfortunately though, there was a noticeable lack of pug food.

Let Dead Pugs Lie

2006-04-11T20:03:00.000-07:00

After about 9PM, you can put a fork in me. I'm done for the night. As is obvious to anyone, there is nothing that can wake me.

Pugfather

2006-04-09T00:36:00.000-07:00

Looks like all my OCD marking habits have paid off. I run this here neighborhood.

When Pugs Go Bad

2006-04-04T14:40:00.000-07:00

Check out this video of what must be a distant cousin of mine.

Cotton Tongue

2006-04-04T14:24:00.000-07:00

I find that the more tired I get, the more my tongue hangs out.

I'm Back!

2006-03-23T16:41:00.000-08:00

Wow, it's been almost a month since my last post! While Dad would like to play it off with this picture as me just "being on vacation," the real reason was that he was hogging the computer. Sorry about the wait.

Party Animal

2006-02-26T21:14:00.000-08:00

At first I thought that we might be moving again (oh dread!), but it turned out that they were just moving furniture to prepare for their party. I, of course, did my part to greet every guest and make my rounds through the maze of jeans. By 11, I was completed spent, so it was off to bed.

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

2006-02-24T21:37:00.000-08:00

Maybe I loved her too much. Maybe she's just the kind of girl who was looking for something short-term. In any case, Princess broke up and now she's left me.

My Princess Loves Me

2006-02-22T21:05:00.000-08:00

How do I know? She cut off her ear and sent it to me. I'm speaking figuratively of course.

Glowing

2006-02-20T10:51:00.000-08:00

Things are going great with Princess. She doesn't talk back and she loves to just hang out and let me nibble on her ears.

Valentine's Day Gift

2006-02-15T16:49:00.000-08:00

For Valentine's Day, my parents got me a girlfriend. Since my on-again, off-again relationship with Isabelle isn't satisfying my puggish needs, this is a welcome present. When our eyes met, it was love. Her name is Princess and the sounds she makes when I nibble on her in the right places sends shivers down my spine.

Nightly Ritual

2006-02-12T18:18:00.000-08:00

My parents appear to have a disagreement regarding where I'm supposed to sleep. Mama says with them, Dad says in the crate and each evening the same thing happens.

Is this asking too much of a puggy?

2006-02-06T23:19:00.000-08:00

So long as my parents are my only source for food and companionship, I'll play their games. I don't mind playing fetch since something deep down inside beckons me to retrieve things. But what about when it's never been thrown in the first place? Now they have me getting the rope toy for them whenever they say "(translated:) Where's your toy?" This is getting to be a little much.

Turning 35

2006-02-01T23:20:00.000-08:00

Today's my 35th birthday (5 in human years). I'm starting to feel my age. Being an LA pug, my parents have promised me the following by the most highly skilled plastic surgeons for my birthday:

1) Face lift for my brow wrinkles which have been there since birth
2) Botox to clear up the rest
3) Nose job to correct my compressed snout
4) Cologen for my sagging lips
5) Dye for my graying chin hairs
6) Laser hair removal for my belly
7) Testicle implants (I haven't felt like a man since the surgery)
8) Fat injections for my sagging eyes
9) Teeth whitening treatment and porcelain veneers
10) Tail rejuvenation surgery for more of that cinnamon bun swirl
11) Leg extensions so I can be taller
12) Lower ribs removed for a more defined waist
13) Hair plugs so I can get that Pornstache I've always dreamed of
14) Septum piercing for that tough bull dog look
15) Liposuction on the neck (or where I'm supposed to have one)

Forced Yawning

2006-01-24T11:29:00.000-08:00

Mama's discovered that if she scratches me by the whiskers on the lower back of my jaw I am forced to yawn. While this has caused my parents much amusement, it's just made me want to sleep.

Wet Walk

2006-01-02T10:36:00.000-08:00

When Dad said it's raining cats and dogs outside, I was psyched to go for my walk. Unfortunately, all I saw were puddles and regular rain.

Xmas with the Grandparents

2005-12-25T21:59:00.000-08:00

My parents took me on a long drive the other day to my grandparent's house. They have since left me here. It's been tough to get time to blog with all the people in and out of here. They've dressed me and Mama and Dad seem to have taught them some french. Before we left on the car ride though, Mama gave me an early xmas present of peanut butter.

Tough Choices

2005-12-16T19:38:00.000-08:00

When my parents watch TV, I'm forced to decide:

Choice A: On the stomach of one.

Choice B: In "the valley" between the two.

Mama's Back

2005-12-06T12:03:00.000-08:00

My nuclear family is back in order.

Bare Assed

2005-12-05T15:15:00.000-08:00

It sometimes sucks to have a dad who isn't fluent in french. I was trying to tell him for a few days that I had fleas again. He thought I was just itching dry skin from my shower. He gave me some Frontline and shaved my ass (where they hide) bare.

Je Danse Pour La Banane

2005-12-03T18:07:00.000-08:00

I'd do just about anything for just one bite of a banana. Dad knows this and takes advantage of my weakness. He now makes me dance for it.

Excess Skin

2005-12-01T22:57:00.000-08:00

The skin on my forehead and neck doesn't really seem to be attached to anything. Boy do I love to have it squooshed around.

Mama's Left Me Again

2005-11-29T17:49:00.000-08:00

Unfortunately she doesn't seem to understand that I can't read calendars. It's the thought that counts I guess. It's a quiet house with her gone.

Rekindling an Old Flame

2005-11-28T21:04:00.000-08:00

This last weekend, my parents shih tzu-sitted Isabelle. What a dish. Isabelle and I had a fling this last summer but we had a little squabble and she held a grudge. She barked at me through her window and pretended I didn't exist when we'd go on walks together.

Well, we went on a few walks this weekend and she started warming up. At first, she let me walk closely behind her. Later, I caught a wink or two.

Then we arrived at the door before my dad and there was an awkward pause as we waited for him to catch up.

And then...

I think I'm in love.

Thanksgiving

2005-11-25T13:36:00.000-08:00

Mom, Dad and I went over to our aunt & uncle's house for Thanksgiving. Dad let me drive. He worked the pedals of course.

Where's Pugaldo?

2005-11-20T21:42:00.000-08:00

I've been getting good at playing Pug and Go Seek. Click on the picture to see a larger size. Can you find me?

The Evil Vacuum Cleaner

2005-11-13T13:46:00.000-08:00

About once a week, this evil thing comes out of a closet and chases me. Mama grabs onto it and tries to hold it back from me but it always wins this struggle. No matter where I hide, it seems to find me.

Eskimo Puggy

2005-11-11T20:33:00.000-08:00

Mama says this makes me look like a tough lion but I think it makes me look like a girl.

Keepin' His Spot Warm

2005-11-06T13:50:00.000-08:00

My parents got this bed for me, but my brother Jasper spent a lot of time there.

I've been keeping his spot warm in his absence.

Bye Bye Jasper

2005-11-02T19:36:00.000-08:00

At first I didn't want to share my crate with Jasper, but now that he's gone, I miss him.

A Cure

2005-11-01T21:20:00.000-08:00

Mama took me to the vet to see why I was so thirsty and sneezing all the time. He gave her a green bottle of white pellets that she now hides in my food.

It's Good To Be The King

2005-10-30T17:44:00.000-08:00

Finally, the respect I deserve.

Severely Dehydrated

2005-10-24T22:47:00.000-07:00

I can't explain it. But I am DYING of thirst. Mama and Dad have removed all the water in the house. Why are they torturing me? Dad let me have some for about a minute today, but then took it away again. What's the deal? I'm SO THIRSTY!!!

Crackin' out the sweater

2005-10-20T23:16:00.000-07:00

It's been cold the last few days. Is it winter already?

Puggy Flu

2005-10-19T15:36:00.000-07:00

I've been puking up everything. Life sucks!

Squatter

2005-10-14T20:33:00.000-07:00

Since when do cats like crates? Now I'm a cuddler, not a fighter, but if Jasper thinks I'm sharing my room with him, he's sadly mistaken.

Mama's Back!

2005-10-12T16:26:00.000-07:00

I'm once again part of a nuclear family.

Missing Mama

2005-10-09T22:48:00.000-07:00

I can't remember Mama ever being gone for this long. Dad's essentially let me move in to his bedroom at night. He had to wake me up twice last night from pugmares. I was dreaming that Dad left too and it was just me and the cats. I don't want to be a latchkey puggy.

Coping without Mama

2005-10-05T21:36:00.000-07:00

With Mama out of town, things just aren't as lively. Tonight, Dad didn't come home until after 9PM!!! He let me out midday, but I was still getting worried. It was dark out for a while. Pugs are highly domesticated you know.

2005-10-05T21:33:00.000-07:00

But there are benefits as well, such as the fact that I got a full banana in my food for the 3rd meal in a row.

Mama's left me

2005-10-02T14:20:00.000-07:00

I found out yesterday that Mama isn't taking me to Paris with her (not enough room in her suitcase). She showed me when she was going to be gone but I'm not too good with calandars.

Showatime

2005-09-24T21:29:00.000-07:00

My weekly suds massage. I LOVE IT! I'm one spoiled puggy.

Turning My Underbite Frown Upside Down

2005-09-22T19:28:00.000-07:00

At first I was very worried. Here it was time for bed and all my bedding was still wet in the washing machine because Dad forgot to switch the load. Everything turned out okay though. Instead of locking me in my crate to sleep on the cold steel floor, Mama said I could come sleep in their bed for the night.

Jersey Dress Up Season

2005-09-18T21:10:00.000-07:00

About once a week during the fall, Dad and I dress up and watch TV for a few hours. Unfortunately it's often hard to sleep because he's always popping up and down.

Die Red Man! Die!

2005-09-17T17:13:00.000-07:00

I was walking through the house, minding my own business, when I saw Red Man giving me the eye. When will that man ever learn? I can't be having him think he's better than me, so I picked him up and shook him back and forth in my mouth. That oughta teach him!

Zoopugger

2005-09-13T21:13:00.000-07:00

I call this one 'Blue Steel'. Seriously though, you know what I could go for right now? Orange Mocha Frappachino!

The Puginator

2005-09-09T23:33:00.000-07:00

Have you seen John Connor? I am Cyberdine Model 101 sent here from the future to look cute.

Pugs Being Abandoned!!!

2005-09-06T14:59:00.000-07:00

My dad was telling me that some parents in New Orleans are being told that they can't bring their puggies (and other pets). They are being left to fend for themselves. We pugs are very dependent on our parents, not just for cuddling and fetch, but for food, water, etc. Please don't forget to donate and help save us: https://secure.hsus.org/01/disaster_relief_fund_2005?source=drfhbp

Fresh Bed

2005-09-05T22:47:00.000-07:00

Mama gave me a bath, then she washed my sheets, and then my bed. It's SO SOFT!!!

Lampshaded

2005-08-27T14:32:00.000-07:00

I'm not really sure what I did wrong. I don't feel I deserve this treatment. The cats laugh at me and I can't chew on my bone. When I walk through doorways, I forget to give myself an extra few inches and I always clip the wall. Worst of all, my paws really itch. Until Mama slapped this thing on me I was able to lick them, but now I can't reach them.

Mama's Back!!!

2005-08-25T21:27:00.000-07:00

Good thing too. Dad doesn't talk much without Mama around. The house was getting quiet.

Nervous

2005-08-20T12:37:00.000-07:00

Mama packed a bag and left this morning with Dad. When this happens, I always assume the worst. Luckily, Dad has returned but without Mama.

Hike up Runyon Canyon

2005-08-14T21:55:00.000-07:00

Today, mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa took me on a walk up Runyon Canyon!

2005-08-14T21:54:00.000-07:00

It was a great view from the top.

2005-08-14T21:52:00.000-07:00

A pug gets thirsty when out in nature's hot sun. Runyon Canyon is dog friendly with a leash-free area and dog bowls with water every so often. I however, find these cest pools to be strictly for the bourgeois. I only drink bottled water.

2005-08-14T21:47:00.000-07:00

On the way back down, we ran into a 3 month old pug puppy. He didn't seem to want to play with me. Ticked off about this, I decided to explain to him the harsh realities of life. "One day," I whispered to him, "you'll wake up and they'll have cut off your balls."

Baby Puggy

2005-08-12T18:06:00.000-07:00

I met a 12 1/2 week old black pug on my walk today. She was a non-barker yet fearless.

2005-08-12T18:01:00.000-07:00

As soon as we finished our cordial sniffing, it was off to the races.

Pugly or Ugly?

2005-08-11T11:10:00.000-07:00

Mom and Dad say that the secret to my good looks is that I get plenty of beauty sleep while they're at work and school. Lately however, Dad's been hanging around the house all day. It's hard to sleep when there's someone available to play tug-o-war and fetch with, not to mention the quality lap sitting time. Anyways, my brother Kilborn said I was ugly this morning and he's made me feel self-conscious.

Romantic Evening Stroll

2005-08-05T23:47:00.000-07:00

Things are getting serious around here. Dad chaperoned my sweetheart Isabelle and me on another walk tonight. Unfortunately though she either has her period or she's developed overactive bladder syndrome because she was wearing a diaper. Dad told me it was a chastity belt because she wasn't "that kind of shih tsu" but I'm not buying it. I see the way she looks at me.

Like a Rock

2005-08-01T22:12:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, if I'm lucky, my dad forgets to put me in my crate until late at night. During the summer months I'm relegated to the foot of the bed but I'll take it over an early trip to the crate any night.

Tough Mutha Pugger

2005-07-30T20:35:00.000-07:00

I may not jump the highest or run the fastest, but I'm virtually undefeated in tug-o-war. I've been kickin' my dad's ass since I was a puppy. He just keeps on trying though.

Walkin' With Isabelle

2005-07-25T18:36:00.000-07:00

This weekend while taking care of my girlfriend Isabelle, I was able to go on many walks with her. She definitely lacks the energy of a pug and is confined to a leash but it's always nice to have someone to show off for.

World's Ugliest Dog

2005-07-24T12:01:00.000-07:00

I was surfing around the net today and found a pic of the world's ugliest dog. Ew!

Vet Visit

2005-07-24T09:16:00.000-07:00

Today, Dad took me to the vet. I've had hives the last few days, I have scabs under my arm pits although I don't wear a harness, and my paws are red.

2005-07-24T09:15:00.000-07:00

The Vet took me away from Dad so I could get skin tests. It really hurt.

2005-07-24T09:14:00.000-07:00

Turns out I have fleas. So Dad shaved me (keeping a tassle on my tail), gave me a bath, and is putting on meds.

Isabelle and Me

2005-07-23T10:45:00.000-07:00

My girlfriend's parents have gone out of town. Now before you all jump to conclusions, I'll let you know that my mom or dad has chaperoned every visit and walk we've been on.

I Lova Da Meds

2005-07-20T18:56:00.000-07:00

I broke out in a few hives tonight. The heat probably, though my degree is in fashion, not medicine. Mama gave me some children's benadryl which always seems to work.

Where are opposable thumbs when you need them?

2005-07-20T07:31:00.000-07:00

I have been successful chewing a hole in one of my blankets. Mama thought it'd be fun to then make me wear it around my neck. I didn't think it was that much fun, so I tried getting it off.

2005-07-20T07:29:00.000-07:00

Needless to say, it's harder than it looks.

My Room Ain't No Cage

2005-07-16T10:13:00.000-07:00

Nothing like a good crate with a nyla bone. It's one of the only 'No Cats Allowed' territories in the house. I often hang here throughout the day. Smells like pug too (that's a good thing).

Long-haired Pug

2005-07-13T20:55:00.000-07:00

Today I met Lulu. I ran circles around her and barked but she didn't give me much of a reaction. My parents are always complaining about me shedding all over the place, but would they rather I'm just weighed down by all that hair like Lulu?

Gus

2005-07-07T20:58:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago some my new friend Gus moved in to the apartment below me. He's a pit but he's really nice. His parents found him roaming the streets of Hollywood when he was a puppy. We've been having a great time playing. He's also given me some pointers on walking tough.

My Princess

2005-07-06T20:29:00.000-07:00

I saw my Isabelle on my walk this afternoon. She's so hot! I showed off my speed and agility. She was obviously impressed as she let me sniff her butt afterwards.

Afternoon Naps

2005-07-04T22:41:00.000-07:00

I love lazy 3-day weekends.

We'll Call It A Draw

2005-07-01T18:07:00.000-07:00

Kemo and I had a good chase session yesterday. We're pretty evenly matched.

Who took me for a ride? This dog or my dad?

2005-06-29T20:31:00.000-07:00

On my walk yesterday, Dad tried to convince me that this guy was giving free rides around the neighborhood. Was I being gullable? I've never seen him giving rides to other dogs. Dad says he's particular about which dogs he gives rides to; he only likes ones with similar tones of fur. I couldn't stay on very well so I guess I'll never find out the truth.

New Treat

2005-06-24T16:43:00.000-07:00

Mama bought me this yummy bone. She's been giving it to me a little at a time, making me work for it.

Who's Your Puggy?

2005-06-22T20:29:00.000-07:00

I got to see my friend Zoe and her brother on my walk today. I think Zoe's a pug like me, but she's all black. Zoe says that she's a pug and that her brother is just as pug as me. Her rationale is that pugs are black and her brother is just thin and has a big nose and a straight tail. So according to Zoe, he has the right color and the wrong body and I have the right body and the wrong color. If you ask me, Zoe's gone crazy in her late years. Every pug in the movies and on TV looks like me. There's no way her brother is a pug.

Rope Removal

2005-06-20T21:14:00.000-07:00

Don't get me wrong, I like my new bed. But this little gold rope border? Being a neutured pug named Francois has caused others to question my masculinity enough. I don't need my new bed giving them new excuses. It's gotta go. I'll keep you all posted on my progress.

Clownin' Around

2005-06-17T17:47:00.000-07:00

Mama put a strawberry on my nose and told me to "ne bouge pas" (stay). I'm a veteran to this trick. I'm not allowed to flip it into my mouth until she says "bon chien" (good dog). She try's throwing me off by yelling "eat it" in english or even "bon chat" (good cat). But I'm no fool. This time however, she told me to quit clowning around which didn't make sense considering I was being a perfectly behaved puggy. Mama's weird sometimes.

My Very Eventful Day

2005-06-14T21:45:00.000-07:00

This morning, Mama took me to my veterinarian for my annual shots. He also took a look at my poop and gave me some medicine to help me deal with my recent reoccurring problem. Here I am waiting patiently for my appointment.

2005-06-14T21:44:00.000-07:00

Next Mama took me to where she works. I seriously don't understand why she doesn't take me here every day instead of leaving me at home. I heard from some other dogs in the neighborhood that worker productivity is increased with a pug close by.